結婚応援日記2008年10月16日
●歳の差、婚。
あるかたのお話です。
現在30歳を少し越え、本格的に婚活をしなければと、いろいろ頑張っておられます。
27歳の時に 19歳の男性に 猛烈にアタックされプロポーズも受けたとのことです。
まだお相手は学生でしたが、卒業したら再度きちんとプロポーズするからという
彼の真っ直ぐな気持ちを、受け入れるだけの勇気がなく お別れになったとのことですが
あれほど強く自分に向ってきてくれた男性は後にも先にも彼だけだったと
最近、とてもそのことが気になり、婚活に支障が出ているとのことです。
彼が30歳で彼女が38歳だったら、どうなっていたでしょうか？
やはり 19歳じゃ 少し危なかくしくって勇気がいりますが
それなりの生活基盤ができてからなら 男性がかなり年下でもOKの時代になってきています。
私事で恐縮ですが 主人の母は父より7歳年上でしたが、とっても仲が良く 義母が亡くなったときは
ほんとうに大変でした。そして後を追うようその2年後義父も他界しました。
今は天国でまた睦ましく一緒にいると思います。
本当は縁あるかただったのに、 男女の年齢差が逆転しているからということだけで
その出会いを見過ごしたということは、けっこうみなさんあると思います。
結婚生活というのは長く、 難題を越えて行かなければいけないことに何度も遭遇します。
一緒にいるのに自分だけで乗り越えていかなければいけない
そんな孤独で辛い目に合わないためにも、いざというときに 絆をしっかり確かめあうことが
できる人とは。それは、まず自分の気持ち次第、相手ではないのです。
この人のためなら多少の妥協や忍耐はできるという覚悟でスタートし
現実にその辛苦を何度か乗り越え、やっと手に入れる絆だと思います。
それにはやはり年月を必要とします。
相手「許す」という懐の大きさを持った人が男女とも、一番良いように思います。
総体的に考えて、お相手とのご縁を大切に「婚活」をしてくださることを願っております。
このエントリーのトラックバックURL:
http://www.premarri.com/mt/mt-tb.cgi/275
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